Wow, okay. Words are kind of difficult for me right now. I’m sitting in my hut back in Bweyale, trying to think of how to express what I’m feeling right now.
I said goodbye to those in Bobi this morning, which was difficult enough. Now, things are only getting worse. Coming back to Bweyale almost felt like coming home. So many familiar faces, so many beautiful memories here – and I have to say goodbye so soon. Fortunately, some good memories were made even since I’ve arrived. I introduced a new song to a few of the girls today, took a few funny videos of us hanging out, and attended my last fellowship meeting. Also, I had some time with my friends Joyce and Janet this evening, where they prayed over me. When they were finished, I asked if I could pray over them as well, and I got about as far as “Dear Lord” and then started to cry as I spoke. The two girls, a couple of my very closest friends here, comforted me and spent some time with me until they had to go.
Ugh, this is just way too hard. Goodbye’s are hard enough. Saying goodbye to 400 of the most beautiful people you’ve ever met is a bit difficult.
(Family, be prepared because when I get home, I’m probably going to be a jet-lagged, emotional wreck)
But this is another one of those times where the specific situation I’m finding myself in makes certain lyrics seem absolutely perfect in regards to what I’m feeling. In this case, my inspiration comes from Hillsong Worship’s song called Broken Vessels (hence the title). These words are simple but poignant, and they’re accurate to what’s in my head right now.
Oh I can see it now.
I can see the love in Your eyes.
Laying Yourself down,
Raising up the broken to life.
Yes, I can see it so clearly now – the incredible and compassionate love that God has for His children. He gave up Himself, the ultimate act of love and humility, so that we could all be brought back into the light. I see the beauty that can come from humanity. As broken as we are in some ways, God has restored us in other ways to bring joy and goodness into the world. When I look at the young men and women here that worship with complete abandon, love so fiercely, and live out the humility and grace that Christ displayed for us, I see a glimpse of the love He has for them through His eyes.
I’m going to miss living here. God has used this place to change me in so many ways, and I’m honestly a little bit afraid of going home and slipping back into my old lifestyle. Life lessons can sometimes be forgotten when you return to an environment where you are the only person who has experienced any of it. So right now, I’m praying that He will give me the strength to live out the things I’ve become aware of here, and keep old habits from taking over. I don’t want to shrug off the problems I know I will see back home just because everyone else sees certain things as the norm. I need to prepare myself for American culture, and be able to stand firm in the face of things that might tempt me to forget what I’ve learned here.
So yeah.
We leave for Entebbe at 9:30 tomorrow morning! Wish us luck and please be praying that we have a smooth journey!
hEY MOM! DAD! ASHLEY! BRANDON! I’LL SEE YOU IN TWO DAYS!!
{Haley}